Friday, June 18, 2004


It is 5.27. My eyes are straining. My head is spinning. My brain feels like its a potpourri of thai cuisine. My heart feels as if its going to burst open any second now. I feel like crying.
I am being unable to come to terms with crystallographic maps and models. A two hours meeting with Jim Snyder and Jim Nettles ensued yesterday, and therein lay a ray of hope. Its 5.27 on the next day. I have at least managed to generate two electron density maps, preceded by a mammoth task of hopeless file transferring from one root directory to the other. The maps show a perfect fit on the maps already generated by the voluble Nettles. Maybe there is hope. I know more today than what I knew yesterday. Still I fell saturated. Time to go home and stop thinking about this. Maybe a book about Oppenheimer and a cup of hot coffee will ease the pain. Anyway, there is hope. Always. So this time will pass. Good days will come. We will see the light, finally. Give me strength, o unknown source of strength. I will finally triumph. I know I will. We will.


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